got hit in the head with a birdie as I went out the door. (the badminton kind, not the real thing.)
stepped over trash, a dead rat, and some (what I think were) chicken bones.
held my nose as I passed the open sewage.
got offered a ride by 5 moto drivers and 4 tuk-tuk drivers. (I hear "hey lady" quite often.)
encountered two barefoot little girls and then...
a family of six living on the corner begging for food.
walked in the street because the sidewalk was blocked by cars, motos, and people sitting in chairs.
almost got hit head-on by two motos and almost sideswiped by two more. (they really don't look where they are going. they just go.)
had some unidentifiable sludge splashed on my leg. (i don't even really want to know. antibacterial wipes come in handy here.)
had a truck backfire a cloud of black exhaust in my face.
saw chicken parts, pig parts, and some kind of animal intestines for sale.
got offered a grilled banana.
passed a group of tuk-tuk drivers betting on cards.
walked too close to a cart full of garbage as I was trying to avoid a moto. ugh.
stepped over trash, a dead rat, and some (what I think were) chicken bones.
held my nose as I passed the open sewage.
got offered a ride by 5 moto drivers and 4 tuk-tuk drivers. (I hear "hey lady" quite often.)
encountered two barefoot little girls and then...
a family of six living on the corner begging for food.
walked in the street because the sidewalk was blocked by cars, motos, and people sitting in chairs.
almost got hit head-on by two motos and almost sideswiped by two more. (they really don't look where they are going. they just go.)
had some unidentifiable sludge splashed on my leg. (i don't even really want to know. antibacterial wipes come in handy here.)
had a truck backfire a cloud of black exhaust in my face.
saw chicken parts, pig parts, and some kind of animal intestines for sale.
got offered a grilled banana.
passed a group of tuk-tuk drivers betting on cards.
walked too close to a cart full of garbage as I was trying to avoid a moto. ugh.
That's just a small taste of it. It's impossible to truly paint a picture of the orchestrated bedlam that abounds. The sights, the sounds, the smells. It can seem chaotic and feel overwhelming.
And yet...as I was wiping the sludge off my leg, I realized...I love this place.
Yep. Those of you who know the allergic, bug-hating, germaphobic, dietary impaired, rodent-fearing person that I am gotta wonder about that one. (Really, if I could jump into a large vat of hand sanitizer at the end of the day I would.)
So, you know that the love in my heart for this place and these people doesn't come from me, but from the One who sent me. At first glance, this place is dark, despairing, and dirty. But look through the right lens, and you can start to see the beauty beneath the surface... A child's smile on a grime-streaked face. Bright colors against the red dirt. Even the ebb and flow of traffic can be mesmerizing. (As long as you're not trying to cross the street, I suppose.)
On my own, I'm pretty sure I would not have bothered to look.
And I guess that's the way it can be in tough situations. It's easier to see the dirt than it is to look for the hidden beauty. Or to focus on the despair and miss the offer of hope. And while stepping over obstacles or trying to avoid being side-swiped by that which threatens to knock us down or cover us in grime, our gaze shifts away from the One who promises to hold us by the hand and keep our feet from stumbling (ps 37 & ps 116) and instead fixes on the problem before us.
So glad I don't have to do this alone. So thankful that He is faithful to bring my focus back to where it needs to be. Without that, pretty sure I would still be freaked out by the sludge. (There's not enough sanitizer in the world for that one!)
By the way, I decided to take a moto back to the house instead of walking. That's a whole different story. But one I don't think my mom really needs to hear.
And yet...as I was wiping the sludge off my leg, I realized...I love this place.
Yep. Those of you who know the allergic, bug-hating, germaphobic, dietary impaired, rodent-fearing person that I am gotta wonder about that one. (Really, if I could jump into a large vat of hand sanitizer at the end of the day I would.)
So, you know that the love in my heart for this place and these people doesn't come from me, but from the One who sent me. At first glance, this place is dark, despairing, and dirty. But look through the right lens, and you can start to see the beauty beneath the surface... A child's smile on a grime-streaked face. Bright colors against the red dirt. Even the ebb and flow of traffic can be mesmerizing. (As long as you're not trying to cross the street, I suppose.)
On my own, I'm pretty sure I would not have bothered to look.
And I guess that's the way it can be in tough situations. It's easier to see the dirt than it is to look for the hidden beauty. Or to focus on the despair and miss the offer of hope. And while stepping over obstacles or trying to avoid being side-swiped by that which threatens to knock us down or cover us in grime, our gaze shifts away from the One who promises to hold us by the hand and keep our feet from stumbling (ps 37 & ps 116) and instead fixes on the problem before us.
So glad I don't have to do this alone. So thankful that He is faithful to bring my focus back to where it needs to be. Without that, pretty sure I would still be freaked out by the sludge. (There's not enough sanitizer in the world for that one!)
By the way, I decided to take a moto back to the house instead of walking. That's a whole different story. But one I don't think my mom really needs to hear.
6 comments:
So does that mean you'll be going back? I know this is a decision that is heavy on your heart. Please know that I am praying for you as you sludge through another life-changing decision.
I could picture (and smell) everything as you were describing it. I thought about trying the bananas just to say that I did so.
I thought of you this morning when we were without power and I had to use a bottle of water to brush my teeth. We, I, take everything for granted from having safe water to drink to crossing the street safely.
BTW - I put that big container of surgical wipes back in the box in the laundry room if you need them.
Praying for you as you are on the front lines with battle scares or sludge. Love you!
This was beautiful, Jen. Thank you so much for sharing!
Thank you for saving the details...but I will still put in some extra prayers tonight...Love you...stay safe...Mom.
Hi, I'm Holly. I came from Marla Taviano's site. I serve as a missionary with Child Evangelism Fellowship in Paris. Just wanted to say that I prayed for God to flood you with His encouragement and peace right now. Thanks for this post!
Jen, I am so proud of you for following God! I have often thought how much His hand is a part of you even being in a third world country. This was a blessing to read and I love seeing how God is using you! Love you bunches!
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